The art of conversation is the art of loving one's neighbor. One must love one's neighbor. Love is honesty, benevolence, joy, usefulness, respect, tolerance, kindness, mindfulness, relaxation, and the absence of fear.
Honesty is the best strategy, and miraculously it always produces good consequences. Good it does not mean expected and does not mean that you wanted it or will be happy with it, but those that in a system-wide sense can be called good.
Everyone is afraid of being thought badly of. This is normal, we all live in a society. On the other hand, given that everyone is focused on themselves, people think about others solely about their attitude to themselves.
Breaking someone else's borders is an act of disrespect and aggression, which means that there is no love between you. But there is a thirst for power and pride. Keep your distance from those who don't understand the word "no".
The following ways can be used to create a comfortable psychological background: support by agreement, support by approval, flattery and admiration, approving gestures, sharing common interests and ideas.
No need to argue, no need to justify anything. You need to listen carefully and think about how you can use the situation for the benefit of the case. Even if I disagree, there is no need to argue. Say, "all right, all right, let's think."
In conversation, hold your breath more often. Your interlocutor uses this pretext to make you a listener, which is good. The more you listen and the less you speak, the more intelligent and smart in all respects you seem to others.
The most important thing in communication is to learn to listen attentively. Don’t get distracted, don’t idly observe flies while reflecting upon the nature of eternity, but listen with great and vehement interest, soaking in every word and gesture of your interlocutor.
Nothing spoils a person more than his infinite desire to criticize or to give valuable advice… The two common cents you contribute to the conversation are like flies in a soup. Nobody likes flies, so remember that your criticism, moaning and valuable advice are as if you kept saying “I’m a fool, I’m a fool, I’m a fool”…
Extremely frustrating when you say something to him, and he looks at you like a sheep at a new gate. What is there to talk about with a sheep? Remember not to be a sheep, read more. Reading able any sheep magically turned into a quite decent man, with whom pleasant to communicate.
As a consolation, reflexive answers work well. By affirming aloud the right of a person to suffer, it is as if you are freeing him from suffering. Now that he knows he had a right to his emotions, it'll be a relief.
A great way to get out of an unnecessary dispute is to say "Yes, of course. Yes, of course you're right." The main thing is not to prove anything, do not justify and do not justify anything. Shake your head thoughtfully, but in your heart, ignore all this nonsense.
I'm trying to get a new thought out of making somebody's acquaintance. To galvanize a person into doing something useful is often a difficult thing to do. But often enough people share information easily, as well as give fresh ideas and galvanize into doing something useful.
Even really empty people may provide me with very interesting and unusual thoughts, or make me want to perform their job for them, and thus train well or just do a good thing...
Even idiots, causing a lot of problems are totally useful. Those problems that they cause make you muster all strength and make you stronger and better.
And if you happen to talk to a smart person, then you'll simply plunge into an ocean of pleasure. The main thing in it all is to have a subject for discussion, otherwise it's very difficult to get use out of a yuk-yuk. It's like fishing with one's hands in a lake...
The nicest people to talk to are cynics: they take the world as it is and don't try to change anything... kindly laughing at its imperfection.
And the most unbearable ones are idealists... they're always dissatisfied with everything, want to change something and somehow are always sure that everything and everyone is obliged to help them... to fit the world to their idealistic picture...
You don't have to say anything to say something. The words are only 20% of the information, the rest is felt by your interlocutors. Moreover, silence is more sincere than words, it is a kind of telepathy, it is more difficult to deceive feelings than ears. The same applies to you - listening to stillness and silence, in the pauses between the words, you will hear and feel much more than words can say even theoretically.