Education of children is not reduced to the concept of "who is a good child", but the answer to the question: "Who is a well-mannered parent?". Bad parents can't raise good children. The problem is that parents do not know or are deeply mistaken in the question "how to be good?".
Parents should restrain and not restrain the child in his desires in order to bring up a harmonious child. Push and to show anger is undesirable, it is better to remain calm. It is undesirable to show children that they do not meet expectations, it creates fear and aggression in them.
Mental personality disorders arise when educators begin sweroside to suppress in the child the negative manifestations of personality. As a result, one decreases, the other disproportionately increases, and in the system there is a huge tension, up to the destruction of the personality and its fragmentation. In the human personality should be all and that all must compete to keep each other.
The child wanted to learn to play the guitar, he was sent to study piano. The child wanted to do Boxing, he was sent to Aikido. The child wanted one thing, he imposed another. It is violence, it is pride on the part of parents, it teaches children lies, and lies generate fear, hatred and vices.
Usually the over-love of the child is expressed in the parents ' over-control over him. The parent falls in love with the child to the level of fusion of his personality with his, to the level of possession. A stronger parental personality suppresses the child's weak personality, enveloping him in overcontrol, which leads to the degradation of the child's personality and the development of a number of mental diseases.
Punishment for misconduct should not be solitary, but should be stretched over time. Single events are not perceived as something serious. Truth is a repetitive action. The punishment for wrongdoing and atonement should take a long time. Moreover, until the redemption of guilt, the punished should not receive any rewards and incentives. Otherwise, negative behavior will become a neurotic cycle aimed at attracting attention and the joy of forgiveness through negative behavior. Formed hysterical personality violation. The punished may think that if I am forgiven or not severely punished, then I am loved. And to start to achieve love and satisfaction. The punishment should be long, painful and unpleasant.
The development of mental illness in a person is usually associated with his parents. A mother who does not know how to love, envelops the child with supercontrol and over-care, suppresses the personality of the child, destroying his psyche. Such a child is poorly adapted to the surrounding reality, full of fears and prejudices. The personality of the child is depressed and dependent.
There is nothing scarier for a child than his mother’s arrogance. Arrogance wants domination. Arrogance transforms love into the thirst for power. A mother dominating her child suppresses his personality and transforms him into a schizophrenic.